Saturday, June 9, 2012

(Insane News) "Car thief who was high on drugs and masturbating when he plowed into Portland crime scene will not have to register as sex offender"

Found on




A man who was intoxicated and masturbating to pornography when he drove a stolen car through the crime scene tape surrounding the homicide of a teen-age boy last year will not have to register as a sex offender. 


Judge Michael McShane  said Friday that he thought mental illness -- not sexual motivations -- led Kevin Signalness  to a new low on April 18, 2011. 


That's the night several police officers saw Signalness, 41, plow into the area they had cordoned off to investigate the death of Shiloh Hampton,  14, who had been fatally wounded on a sidewalk in Northeast Portland's Holladay Park, just south of Lloyd Center shopping mall. When one of the officers confronted Signalness about his masturbation and the pornography on the front passenger seat, Signalness reportedly replied "You caught me red-handed..."

to read the rest of the article click here

And now the bestest, cutest, sweetest cartoon of all time!