Saturday, July 11, 2009
Clive Barker's BOOK OF BLOOD
They're trying to make each of the Books Of Blood stories into movies?
I liked MIDNIGHT MEAT TRAIN well enough, lets see what they can do with this one.
CTHULHU the movie
I have GOT to get around to seeing this.
Then again I have a whole shelf of DVDs I have GOT to get to don't I?
5 Second Fiction One Hundred
The hot date ended when maggot-ridden zombies surrounded the car. They could see parasites by the dashboard light.
5 Second Fiction Ninety Nine
He knew dozens of ways to take down an enemy, unfortunately none of them involved those little Styrofoam packing noodles.
5 Second Fiction Ninety Eight
For Matrim revenge was easy, knowing when to stop wasn't a skill he ever bothered to learn.
5 Second Fiction Ninety Seven
Psychotic Kid defended patriotism in a ninja costume made from an actual flag. If you mentioned the irony you got punched.
Friday, July 10, 2009
5 Second Fiction Ninety Six
At first he hadn't been sure about wearing a cape but after his first spandex malfunction Captain Hero was glad of it
5 Second Fiction Ninety Five
Of all his wife's birthmarks it was the one that resembled Elvis that disturbed Cliff the most. It seemed to stare at him.
5 Second Fiction Ninety Four
She left him overcome with passion. He left her wondering if she'd made a mistake.
5 Second Fiction Ninety Three
Possessed of an apocalyptic vision he built an ark in record time. When it started to snow his screams scared the animals.
Thursday, July 9, 2009
5 Second Fiction Ninety Two
The question that haunted Agent Krump was why would gunfights erupt between gangs of Cryptozoologists and Furries?
5 Second Fiction Ninety One
He learned that not only was pro wrestling real but it was also how the nations of the world secretly resolved disputes.
5 Second Fiction Ninety
They had the makings of a great super hero team but sadly all the good names were already under copyright.
5 Second Fiction Eighty Eight
Lord Evernight dropped onto his prey, leaving them wide-eyed. These were the moments he wished would last forever.
5 Second Fiction Eighty Nine
The Denny's manager had a real problem with the way Brett cleaned the ladies room. Mostly because he didn't work there.
5 Second Fiction Eighty Seven
Over the course of her freshman year Audra made enemies among students, faculty and, surprisingly enough, the Chinese mafia.
Wednesday, July 8, 2009
A painful memory...
The excellent blog Plaid Stallions caused me to have a junior high flashback with this picture.
no wonder I failed 9th grade...
no wonder I failed 9th grade...
5 Second Fiction Eighty Six
Magwier didn't want to dignify his execution with a final statement but he hated not getting in the last word.
5 Second Fiction Eighty Five
He had two options- he could shoot his way out or hide in a time-share seminar. Zeth was glad he brought extra ammo.
5 Second Fiction Eighty Four
He said goodbye but she didn't listen, that had been the problem all along.
5 Second Fiction Eighty Three
There was no stopping Fuego but then he heard the phrase every superhero dreaded, "Ninjas with bulldozers."
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
HUMAN CENTIPEDE... oh My GOD!
I would like to thank and curse Horrorsnotdead.com for bringing this film to my attention.
What is the plot you may ask?
"Internationally respected Siamese twin surgeon Dr. Josef Heiter has a demented vision for mankind’s future existence. He wants to remove human beings’ kneecaps so they have to exist on all fours and then surgically graft them mouth-to-anus to form a centipede chain. When two stranded female Americans arrive at his luxury home-cum-hospital looking for help, his long-gestating plan swiftly moves into chilling action with a shocking force. Kidnapping a third Japanese male tourist he begins the tissue matches, teeth removal and buttock moulding to create his triplet creature."
The link above has a link to some NSFW pictures from the film.
Folks, I think this film is so far beyond screwed up it will take the light from screwed up 10,000 years to reach it.
I wonder if I can trick my wife into seeing it with me...
'A Study In Emerald' By Neil Gaiman
If you haven't read this story you should. Great stuff and it would be a fantastic RPG setting.
You can get the PDF here. They did a really neat job on the layout.
You can get the PDF here. They did a really neat job on the layout.
5 Second Fiction Eighty Two
And once again Captain Hero had to explain to his sidekick it was their duty to capture villians not strip search them.
5 Second Fiction Eighty One
Joe vowed to get a new agent when he landed a role in a groin punching fetish video. If only he had read the script first...
5 Second Fiction Eighty
Renovations on the old house were going smoothly; walls knocked out, flooring pulled up. That night the shadmocks escaped...
Sunday, July 5, 2009
Fourth of July fireworks are like sex-
There's a lot of anticipation but even if you've got the right match it all seems to be over too soon.
5 Second Fiction Seventy Nine
By the time he was close enough for her to see he was covered with tics it was already too late.
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