5 Second Fiction One Hundred and Twenty Six

The called this super-villain Overkill, mostly because he used power armor to rob fast food restaurants

5 Second Fiction One Hundred and Twenty Five

The invention of the time machine was quickly followed by an escalating backwards series of patent lawsuits.

5 Second Fiction One Hundred and Twenty Four

After the sixth mysterious editor fatality all hope for a Cliff's Notes for the Necromonicon were abandoned.

5 Second Fiction One Hundred and Twenty Three

Once it was discovered that the he had been nude under the mascot suit counseling was made available to the cheerleaders.

5 Second Fiction One Hundred and Twenty Two

The Warlords of Beta Pictoris teleported their advance guard into the midst of Gen-Con. All plans of invasion were scrapped.

5 Second Fiction One Hundred and Twenty One

The virus left her with flatulence that sounded just like the first ten seconds of Van Halen’s 'Hot for Teacher'.

5 Second Fiction One Hundred and Twenty

The hospice, the funeral, the wake... None of it felt real until the night she realized he had no one to argue with.

5 Second Fiction One Hundred and Nineteen

He turned his action film directorial sensibilities to the field of erotica and was promptly arrested.

"There's Always an A-Hole on the Internet"

And now a news article that tells a true story of two-fisted adventure!

From the San Mateo Daily Journal

A large parolee wearing nothing but tennis shoes led sheriff’s deputies on a high-speed car and foot chase that ended with him being Tasered, shot with a bean bag gun and arrested for indecent exposure after allegedly exposing himself, according to the District Attorney’s Office.


Deputies chased Peter Allen Steele, 38, on Saturday after responding to two reports in Woodside and Portola Valley of a 6-foot-7-inch, 250-pound man ringing a doorbell and standing naked in a doorway. Deputies reported seeing a car that matched the victims’ description but the driver sped onto Interstate 280 when deputies tried stopping the vehicle. At Sand Hill Road, the car struck the side of the road, flattening the tires. The driver continued on the rims until the car stopped, then jumped out naked, aside from his shoes, and ran into the open garage of a nearby home. The man went through the residence and to the back where deputies used a Taser and a bean bag gun to end the chase, according to the District Attorney’s Office.


The man, later identified as Steele was taken to the hospital with a pulse of 220 and staff there said he was observed masturbating on the gurney, according to the District Attorney’s Office.


A search of his car turned up a sex toy in the form of rubber female genitalia, according to the District Attorney’s Office.


Steele was charged with two counts of indecent exposure, driving while under the influence, resisting arrest, trespassing, vandalism and fleeing a peace officer.


Steele is on parole for felony assault out of San Francisco and has prior felony convictions for stalking, making threats and evading police.


He remains in custody in lieu of $60,000 bail.




I wonder what he will do for an encore???

5 Second Fiction One Hundred and Eighteen

At long last Clawface's yearly slaughter of campers came to an end. Girl Scout Troop 1667 was not to be fucked with.

5 Second Fiction One Hundred and Seventeen

Amazing Ed was weeping and curled into a ball. Captain Hero shook his head, “Didn't I tell you to wear a cup?”

5 Second Fiction One Hundred and Sixteen

Soft lighting, soft music, they leaned back on the couch, kissing slowly. For a while they both forgot this was goodbye.

5 Second Fiction One Hundred and Fifteen

Of all the monsters that attacked Japan, Phlegmra was the most disgusting.

5 Second Fiction One Hundred and Fourteen

Vito 'the Icepick' didn't think that Hit Men should offer a low price guarantee but the marketplace was so competitive now.

5 Second Fiction One Hundred and Thirteen

Nothing Special Agent Krump hated more than the Troy police, especially the guy that kept text messaging during stakeouts.

5 Second Fiction One Hundred and Twelve

The traps of the MurderMaze were no match for Psychotic Kid, then he reached the part where he had to spell 'Chrysanthemum'

5 Second Fiction One Hundred and Eleven

Alex was thrilled to be taken aboard the alien craft, that ended when he learned of their human-sasquatch breeding program.

5 Second Fiction One Hundred and Ten

It was a fear of heights that drove Kathy to try skydiving, it was an inability to follow instructions that killed her.

5 Second Fiction One Hundred and Nine

She slit him open from belly to ribs, reached in and took hold of his beating heart. They had never known such intimacy.

5 Second Fiction One Hundred and Eight

That night Magwier sent Lorelei out to buy cocoa, she came back with a tattoo. Their relationship had communication issues.

5 Second Fiction One Hundred and Seven

Captain Hero insisted, the new guy could call himself Amazing Ed, or Incredible Ed but Special Ed was out of the question.

5 Second Fiction One Hundred and Six

Agent Krump laughed when his captors force fed him homemade burritos, stopped when they wouldn't let him use the bathroom.

5 Second Ficton One Hundred and Five

While many had tried to combine the arts of ballet and monster trucking no one could ever afford the insurance.

Any of you monster kids out there remember this?

Brother Bill's wonderful blog THE HAUNTED CLOSET had a post about a book I had for most of my childhood called HOW TO CARE FOR YOUR MONSTER.



This really takes me back to the days of the SCHOLASTIC BOOK CLUB and DYNAMITE MAGAZINE.




If you want to see more stop by The Haunted Closet.

5 Second Ficton One Hundred and Four

He started seeing a psychologist to try and put an end to his womanizing ways. If only she hadn't been so hot.

5 Second Fiction One Hundred and Three

In a quiet corner of the party she pressed close to him. He slipped off her glasses, threw them in the aquarium and escaped.

5 Second Fiction One Hundred and Two

Whenever she heard something stupid Mary couldn't help but roll her eyes, her tenure on the board of directors was brief.

5 Second Fiction One Hundred and One

Mel talked his wife and her friend into dinner out and then a threesome. While he was getting ready they left without him.