5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Fifty One
The First Rule of Social Networking is that Facebook is the gateway drug for potential stalkers.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Fifty Two
The Second Rule of Social Networking is that Twitter is IRC with less sophisticated bots.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Fifty Three
The Third Rule of Social Networking is that MySpace will become post-apocalyptic wasteland of abandoned pages and unsigned bands.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Fifty Four
The Fourth Rule of Social Networking that any man that signs up for a Tumblr account will develop an ass fetish within 6 weeks.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Fifty Five
The warrior king Lodan died doing what he loved and since he loved buggering sleeping dragons there wasn't much left to bury.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Fifty Six
“Do you really beat men up with that blackjack?” he asked. "Yes," Lorelei grinned evilly, “and welcome to the club.”
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Fifty Seven
Joe advanced quickly thanks to his people skills, market savvy and backlog of photographs of supervisors in compromising positions.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Fifty Eight
Fed up Americans began turning policians' names into sexual metaphors. Trust me you don't want somebody to Feingold your Gingrich.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Fifty Nine
The war between the cross-dressing bikers and tap dancing mafia left silk petticoats and spangled shoes strewn for miles.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Sixty
Captain Hero knew there was a fine line between crime-fighting and slapstick.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Sixty One
He learned that day never to have breakfast while looking at his Tumblr dashboard but he never ate sausages again.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Sixty Two
The doctors told Tiffany she had mono so she invested in a new stereo right away.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Sixty Three
Karl realized he was playing with himself too much when he started to ejaculate dust.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Sixty Four
He was an Axe murderer! She was a cannibal! Together they went on a self cleaning killing spree.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Sixty Five
Advanced research revealed that the first cathouse in the Old West was run entirely by furries.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Sixty Six
All of America panicked the night the President gave his State of the Union Address via the medium of interpretive dance.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Sixty Seven
Brian knew the nerdy new supervisor was out to get him when he was told he could only wear red shirts to work.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Sixty Eight
The Health Care system didn't cover faith healers until they changed to a Single Prayer format.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Sixty Nine
It was rarely mentioned that the cereal Sugar Smacks was originally marketed to pimps.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Seventy
No one ever suspected that the real Victoria's Secret was a big hairy penis.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Seventy One
His love of Dungeon & Dragons and gymnastics let him to create his signature move: The Critical Split.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Seventy Two
The most popular item at RIENFIELD'S ALL NIGHT DINER was the cheesy flies.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Seventy Three
She said, “I guess dreams really can come true.” but she still had no idea how she got to school in her underwear.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Seventy Four
He was the only professional wrestler to wear feety pajamas in the ring. His specialty was the Sleeper Hold.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Seventy Five
Once he moved from directing mainstream films to porn he learned that 'Key Grip' and 'Best Boy' could mean very different things.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Seventy Six
“The best part of waking up is going right the fuck back to sleep.”
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Seventy Seven
“He fell into a threshing machine while using Twitter. It looks like we've got a case of shredded tweet.”
YEEEEAAAAHHHH!!!!!
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Seventy Eight
Zeb got diarrhea the night before his wedding so he ended up spending all night on the bachelor potty
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Seventy Nine
The brain eating virus devastated the American population but oddly enough few government representatives felt any ill effects.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Eighty
He shouted “Would somebody shut that damn kid up?” and was promptly ejected from the maternity ward's birthing room for it.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Eighty One
When you're part of the Army's Special Hygene Brigade nothing matters more than your rank.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Eighty Two
He was proud of his 25 years of marriage and he was glad to have spread the time out between 7 different wives.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Eighty Three
He simply had to eat twice as many frankfurters as his adversary- it was a double dog dare.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Eighty Four
They thought she was crazy to build a filtration system out of an old mattress but soon people were lining up for her spring water.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Eighty Five
He watched as heroes become reviled as traitors and the great truths were dismissed as lies. Just an average day at FOX NEWS.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Eighty Six
Once again Greg critically injured himself by injecting hot water into his rectum. He had always been his own worst enema.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Eighty Seven
Many were confused when Quentin Tarantino opened a gourmet coffee shop but for him it was just another trip to the grindhouse.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Eighty Eight
“You idiot!” Dave stared at the gown with 'Rick' embroidered on the front, “I said I wanted your name and ADDRESS!”
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Eighty Nine
She mocked religious people for rejecting science but refused to get her kids immunized because of something a supermodel said.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Ninety
It took years of experimentation but he finally managed to combine sandwich with a six string- now he was everyone's guitar hero.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Ninety One
The ninja crept into the crowded dining hall to masturbate, no one heard him coming.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Ninety Two
The Furry Separatists were led by General Cuddlesworth; he was a dangerous man and not to be yiffed with.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Ninety Three
Rex paid for his tuition by selling his sperm, he wasn't the first student to exhaust himself with day long cramming sessions.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Ninety Four
The difference between Stephanie Meyers fans and Tea Partiers is that TWILIGHT fans have actually read the documents they venerate.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Ninety Five
The super hero known as the Black Squirrel returned from battleworld with a snazzy alien costume and a mouthful of strange nuts.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Ninety Six
The Lord works in mysterious ways, his followers inevitably go right for the rough stuff.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Ninety Seven
He called the baseball bat his 'Debate Club' because if you tried to debate him he grabbed it and did some expounding on your ass.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Ninety Eight
Captain Hero and Amazing Ed were captured by the villain known as King Carpenter. Amazing Ed commented, “We are royally screwed.”
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Six Hundred and Ninety Nine
He had a penis and he had a blog. The blog generated more return visits.
5 Second Fiction One Thousand Seven Hundred
“Calls to Ocean World Aquarium may be recorded for training porpoises.”
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