Saturday, January 30, 2010

Shillin' like a Villain Awwww yeah...

IN THIS TWILIGHT tales of lost gods and fragile transformations

This collection of 13 stories transports you to a world where both dreams and monsters lurk in the shadows, where love and forgotten rituals fight for control of the human heart, and where the madness of eternity can be glimpsed in a single segmented eye. This anthology collects some of the best stories from Al Bruno III's website and includes the novellas 'Chad's Oracles', 'Fully Vested' and 'The Mask Collector', available for the first time anywhere. Support independent publishing: Buy this book on Lulu.

IN THE MIDNIGHT OF HIS HEART a novel of horror and obsession

To all outward appearances John Sig is just an old man living a quietly in an empty old house. His one pleasure is when he heads down to the local diner and visits with his favorite waitress Angie. When Angie disappears, John sets out to find her. For an ordinary old man that might seem like a foolish idea but John Sig isn't human, he's a monster living in the shadow of a nightmare thirty -five years old.

In The Pit
This is the comic book I wrote, that sadly it never made it past the first issue. Too bad I had envisioned a fantastic tale of serial killers, Canadian pro wrestlers and exploding toilets. Still though I think you might enjoying reading the first issue, it is still available as a PDF file. There are also some preview pages at the sight below.
Order away and weep for what might have been. Some of my best work is available from the fine folks at Eden Studios. My contribution to their game lines has been mainly in the area of fiction. The rules and setting information was written by other very capable folks like Richard Dakan, CJ Carella, Jack Emmert, George Vasilakos and M. Alexander Jurkat. Believe me, they did all the hard work. If you are a fan of role-playing games or a fan of zombie movies then the books below are going to be right up your alley.
ALL FLESH MUST BE EATEN main rulebook
Enter the dark world of survival horror. The Dead walk among us. This role-playing game allows you to play in a world infested by the walking dead. The main rulebook includes rules for character creation, combat and everything else you need to play in a world of survival horror. Also detailed are the multiple campaign settings so you can customize the type of "deadworld" you wish to explore.232 pages.Hardcover.Cover Art by Christopher Shy. Click here for ordering information
ZOMBIE MASTER SCREEN
A must-have reference for All Flesh Must Be Eaten, the Zombie Master's Screen is filled with charts and tables. From fear to weapons to outcomes, every reference that a prepared Zombie Master needs is packed onto a four-panel screen. The flip side of the screen scares and delights the players with full-color zombie images. The Screen is packed with a 48-page booklet, including a ready-to-run adventure introducing the Cast Member to the horrors of a zombie plague, and pregenerated characters with complete bios, statistics and resource information. Cover Art by Christopher Shy and George Vasilakos. Click here for ordering information
ENTER THE ZOMBIE
Written by Richard DakanThe first supplement to All Flesh Must Be Eaten opens whole new vistas for a walking dead campaign. This tome brings together the thrills of Hong Kong action films and the excitement of flesh-craving horror. The match of these two genres may not have seemed obvious at first, but the pleasures that arise from it are undeniable. After all, zombies and Hong Kong style action make a perfect fit. What better match is there for a relentless series of lightning kicks and a hurricane of bullets than a target that can’t die? The pulse-pounding danger just never stops. Besides, what martial arts master worth his salt doesn't ache for the ability to use his own intestines as a deadly whip? For the undead, no problem!Softcover.Cover Art by Christopher Shy. Click here for ordering information
TERRA PRIMATE
Written by Al Bruno III, CJ Carella, David F. Chapman, Patrick SweenyBased on the original concept by George Vasilakos and Ross IsaacsEdited by M. Alexander Jurkat, David F. ChapmanCover art by Jeff ReitzInterior Art by Storn Cook, Thomas Denmark, Talon Dunning, DW Gross, Jon Hodgson, Chris Keefe, Jason Millet, Matt Morrow, James Powers, Gregory Price, George Vasilakos From the creators of All Flesh Must Be Eaten, similar in style but this time . . . with apes! Terra Primate has no specific setting. The only constant is the concept of intelligent apes. Planet of the Apes is a movie about intelligent apes, but then again so is Congo. As long as the characters are interacting with intelligent apes -- or are intelligent apes themselves! -- the game could be set in the pulp era of adventure, on a post-apocalyptic Earth, on a faraway alien planet, or downtown on Main Street. The main rulebook includes rules for character creation, combat and everything else you need to play in a world where man is the missing link! Also detailed are the multiple campaign settings so you can customize the type of "Apeworld" you wish to explore. Click here for ordering information

Friday, January 29, 2010

The NSFW trailer for FIRED




It's JACOB'S LADDER THE CALL CENTER YEARS!



Read more about the film at TWITCH

News: Her Breasts Are Deadly Weapons! Noboru Iguchi, Yoshihiro Nishimura and Takashi Shimizu Join Forces For THE ANCIENT DOGOO GIRL!



News: Her Breasts Are Deadly Weapons! Noboru Iguchi, Yoshihiro Nishimura and Takashi Shimizu Join Forces For THE ANCIENT DOGOO GIRL!

Posted using ShareThis

Speaking Of Super Heroes...

I am really glad that you folks out there are reading and enjoying my LOCAL HEROES stories.

These are ideas and characters I have carried around in my head since I was a boy and I had long ago lost any hope of anything every coming from them.

This is a picture of them back i did back in 1986 from when I thought I could draw (I couldn't)




They say things never change and I guess when it comes to dreams that is especially true.

Thanks for reading and keep circulating the blog!

(Recommended Reads) leftbrainwrite: Thick With Memory

Daddy weaved over me, his eyes bleary yet indignant.

"Phoebe. Where’s the damn cheddar?” He grunted, then turned, the belt of his plaid robe trailing on the floor. I stumbled up, tripping over the afghan, and followed...


leftbrainwrite: Thick With Memory

(Recommended Reads) " Goldi-locks Part 2" by Ganymeder

The burglar glared at her jailers through the bars as the clock struck for the noonday meal...

click here to read the rest

(Recommended Reads) "Cain and Annabelle" by Amy Taylor

“I don’t do this often, you know…” I didn’t quite know why I was telling him this, but for some reason, it was important to me. It was important what he thought of me...

click here to read the rest

(Recommended Reads) " A Northern Swan Song" by Chance

“Get your lips tighter around it, you’re dribbling.”

This was the third time in the space of ten minutes I had to draw attention to Miss Rotterlicks’ technique. She looked up to me with those bugged eyes of hers, blessed with all the grace of a grasshopper. As she always did in these scenarios, she began to go faster...


click here to continue

(Recommended Reads) "Lament" by Karen Schindler

I'd seen the red ball before of course. Just yesterday as a matter of fact. Little Brianna was playing with it. Bouncing it on the building whap whap whap...

click here to read the rest

Adventures in Nerdliness: Nerd Girl of Note #47


One of my first and longest lasting crushes...

ELDRICH WAY has given me the CIRCLE OF FRIENDS award


I really do treasure these things, they are a sign that my work is being enjoyed.


Now I shall pass the award on to 5 other deserving souls who will than pass it along as well...

J Dane Tyler's Fiction Blog

The Suppertime Sonnets

Mazz In Leeds

Miscellaneous Yammering

Adventures In Nerdliness

Stop by and give them a read!

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Virginity Certificates? Virginity Certificates?? VIRGINITY CERTIFICATES????




How do you did these things GEEKOLOGY?

The Official Site You can certify your friends!

THE LOCAL HEROES: 4-Color Cookout

4-Color Cookout

by
Al Bruno III

It was such a rare thing for the entire team to be together at the same time that the Local Heroes almost came to look forward to global crises. Not that any of the low-powered defenders of River City were ever called upon at times like this but since most citizens and criminals were hiding in their homes it was as good a time for a rooftop cookout.


“Now tell me again who is invading?” displaced luchador Fuego asked as worked the grill. He had once been a champion wrestler but satanic mobsters had robbed him of his title. Because of this he has vowed to wear his mask at all times until he was reinstated - he also refused to wear a shirt but that was more of a lifestyle choice.

“The Quablidoids,” Rusty Johnson, cyborg redneck pointed across the river. “You can tell by the honeycomb shape.” Years ago Rusty had been in a terrible accident, a passing group of friendly aliens saved his life but their unfamiliarity with human physiology had led them to combine parts of his body with parts of his beloved monster truck. The experience, and the resulting series of interplanetary malpractice lawsuits made him the team's expert in all matters of an intergalactic nature.

The cookout was taking place atop the town's second tallest building, a parking garage. From there they had a perfect view of the battle taking place over the night-darkened skies of Megalopolis City. Blasts of laser fire and heat vision flashed though the air like fireworks.

“Oooooo.” Hrothgar the Viking gaped at a particularly lovely explosion of antimatter, his sword in one hand a chili dog in the other. The heroic berserker could only escape from Valhalla so long as he kept his hand on the pommel of his magic blade, if he let go of the blade for more than a few seconds he switched places again with his mild mannered ancestor. While he was a nice enough fellow the team rarely needed the assistance of an asthmatic DMV employee.

Another explosion, another Quablidoid saucer careened wildly and crashed into the Hallenbeck River.

The Maven, Psychotic Kid and Amazing Ed watched the battle with high-powered binoculars while chewing on hamburgers. “Ok who is the new kid over there?” the Maven asked. She was slender and wore a dark purple costume and full face mask. She had to pull the face mask up to her nose so she could eat her hamburger. She was one of the world's greatest detectives and occasionally worked as a consultant for the more notable and powerful superheroes, mostly because beings that could change the course of mighty rivers rarely knew how to solve a murder mystery.

“Which one?”Amazing Ed asked. His costume was a pair of khaki pants, a dime store Lone Ranger mask and a T-Shirt was an 'A' hastily scrawled on it with magic marker. His only known power was his boundless enthusiasm in the face of horrible and regular beatings.

“The one made of fire.”

“Oh. that's Nova-Flame,”

Psychotic Kid wore a ninja outfit made from an American flag and his voice was a constant snarl; some said he sounded like Clint Eastwood with hemorrhoids but never ever to his face. “He applied to be a part of our team,” he said, “The Captain wouldn't have it.”

“Of course not.” Captain Hero said. He was the teams leader and he stood on the ledge of the parking garage, his hands on his hips and his cape billowing, He never wavered in his fervor to defend liberty and the American way, he also made one Hell of a potato salad, “Heroes with fire powers set a dangerous example for the youth of today.”

The Maven gave a little groan, “You have got to be kidding me.”

“I never kid when it comes to the youth of today.”

Fuego looked up from the grill, “Who wants cheeseburgers?”

“Me! Me!” said the woman wearing diaphanous robes and hovering about an inch off the ground. She was Erato, a minor goddess that dabbled in crime fighting and writing smutty novels. The Local Heroes only called upon her in the direst of circumstances mostly because the theological implications of her existence made some members of the team profoundly uncomfortable.

The Maven scanned the aerial battlefield and then stopped, she focused and re-focused her binoculars, “There’s Mighty Woman!”

“Oh cool!” Amazing Ed followed her gaze. “What’s she doing?”

“Bending flying saucers into amusing shapes.”

“Woah.”

Psychotic Kid snorted dismissively, “I hear all her powers come from her golden armor.”

Erato gave the all-American ninja a dirty look, “What’s the difference?”

“Commander Infinity doesn’t need to use special armor to change the course of mighty rivers.”

Rusty Johnson spoke with a mouthful of potato salad, “Yeah, and we all know how the EPA reacted to that.”

“It’s sexism,” the Maven commented, “no one wonders were Commander Infinity gets his powers from.”

“Well what else are we going to talk about when it comes to her?” Psychotic Kid said, “She doesn’t even have a rogues gallery. The number of villains out to kill you is directly proportional your awesomeness. Even Hrothgar has an evil nemesis.”

The viking glared at the ninja, “Are you mocking my blood feud with the Wal Mart legal department? That greeter scoffed at my helmet I tell you.”

“He put a smiley sticker on it for God’s sake.”

Amazing Ed sighed wistfully, “It makes you wonder doesn’t it? Here we are eating and bickering while greater beings decide our fate.”

“Don’t be talk that way,” Captain Hero turned away from the scene to gaze at his team, “what we do here is important. There are some that are destined to move the heavens and others that are destined to work humble miracles.”

Erato smiled, “That would have been more impressive if you didn’t have mustard all down the front of your spandex.”

The Local Heroes were all so busy laughing that no one noticed the Quablidoid mothership sounding the call to retreat.

Watch This: Trailer for Thai Horror Film 'Who Are You?' - Horror Squad

Watch This: Trailer for Thai Horror Film 'Who Are You?' - Horror Squad

5 Second Fiction Eight Hundred and Seventy One

A flask of tequila, a citronella candle and a hypoglycemic lady wrestler was all it took for Monica to lose her security deposit.

5 Second Fiction Eight Hundred and Seventy

The boss might not have gotten all that upset at Scott for sleeping at his desk, but Scott liked to sleep in the nude.

5 Second Fiction Eight Hundred and Sixty Nine

It was a summer romance and he swore he would never forget her but by the fall he could only remember her name.

5 Second Fiction Eight Hundred and Sixty Eight

The mobster with baggy pants shouted, “You gotta have some stones to be messin' with Vito the Scrote!”

5 Second Fiction Eight Hundred and Sixty Seven

Of all the tender deceptions, “If you loved me you would,” is the most dangerous.

5 Second Fiction Eight Hundred and Sixty Six

Amazing Ed lay crumpled on the ground cursing himself for not remembering to throw his grapple line THEN leap from the rooftop.

5 Second Fiction Eight Hundred and Sixty Five

“Demons...” Jason Magwier sneered with contempt, “the gold farmers of the supernatural world.”

5 Second Fiction Eight Hundred and Sixty Four

She was a sex symbol, but the symbol was the same as the one used for biohazzards.

(Recommended Reads) "Chimera" by Maria Protopapadaki-Smith

Cosmonauts Zheng, Masters and Collins looked in disbelief at the images from the satellites.

“This cannot be happening.”
“They’re… They’re…”
“… all gone.”


click here to read the rest

5 Second Fiction Eight Hundred and Sixty Three

Buying the lingerie was easy, getting his wife to actually wear it for him? That was going to be tough.

5 Second Fiction Eight Hundred and Sixty Two

In 2012 Apple introduced the edible online integrated iCecream, Apple fans just melted but there were some headaches.

The 70's: A simpler time with profoundly complex shirts




Plaid Stallions : Rambling and Reflections on '70s pop culture: The Ugly Shirted Gentleman Strike Back!

Wednesday, January 27, 2010

(Insane News) Lizards in pants costs collector

WELLINGTON, New Zealand - A German reptile collector who was caught with 44 lizards down his pants has been jailed for 14 weeks and must pay a $3,540 fine for plundering New Zealand’s wild gecko and skink populations, a judge has ruled...

click here to read the rest


In The Shadow Of His Nemesis chapter forty eight

In The Shadow Of His Nemesis

Chapter Forty Eight

BY AL BRUNO III


-1,183,507,200






She wore a peasant blouse and a loose fitting skirt. Her hair was long and pulled back into a ponytail. There were tiny bells on the silver anklet she wore; they jingled wildly as she ran for her life.

The streets she ran down were empty and unnamed, the buildings and storefronts were vacant. The dust and grime of years covered everything. It caught in her nose and clung to the bottoms of her sandal-clad feet.

Her heart pounded in her chest, her breaths were gasps. She could hear the sound of her pursuers but she wouldn’t dare look back, if she looked back she knew all would be lost.

Benjamin Zachary! she thought. Where the Hell are you?

There was an intersection up ahead- left, right or straight ahead. Where was he? Which way was she supposed to go?

Not that it mattered here in the town of Devsham where every road looped back onto itself again. If I die here… She wondered to herself, If I die in a place that doesn’t exist in maps or memories- will my fravashi find me?

In that moment of fear she almost looked back but stopped herself, wasn’t hearing the mewling buzz of their voices enough? Did she really need to see those dead, segmented eyes a second time?

She cursed herself for agreeing with Benjamin’s plan. Sure split up the party, what could possibly go wrong in an empty town?

Then her sandal caught on the sidewalk and she fell hitting the ground with a gasp and a curse.

“Rio! This way!”

A man called to her to her from a nearby alleyway, jumping up and down and waving his arms. He was short with eyes and hair that were equal parts dark and wild. He wore a thick mustache and a small earring.

“Come on!” Benjamin Zachary urged her, he wore faded jeans and a collared shirt with a tweed blazer “Get up! Hurry.”

But he didn’t come to her rescue; he had long ago warned that her life was expendable to the Cause- his was not. Pushing herself to her feet Rio blundered across the street and into his arms.

“There we go,” he said. “I knew you’d make it. Now let’s get off the street shall we?”

Her pursuers were getting closer, each of them breaking into a run He dragged her into a nearby building and let her slide to the floor while he erected a barricade. It looked like they were in an office of some sort, Rio watched him stack chairs and wondered what kind of work would have been done here- what the Monarchs would possibly need file cabinets and telephones for?

Rubbing her ankle she gave Benjamin a worried glance, “Where were you?”

“I was fine. You’re the one that keeps getting in trouble.”

Rio winced, “That’s not fair.”

“I’m not the one that activated the automated defenses. Luckily I anticipated your mistakes.”

The pounding on the door began; if she closed her eyes she could imagine the legion of tarsal claws striking it. “What do we do now?”

He gave her a wicked grin, “Exploration with a side order of sabotage.”

“We’re gonna get killed,” she said, “or worse.”

“Not me.”

There was a large cracking sound, the turned back to see a blunt beak working its way through the wood of the door, a keening whistle filled the air as a handful of proboscis slithered out testing the air. Benjamin Zachary stared at it in dull confusion, “That’s new.”

“We have to get out of here.”

“Oh yes,” He took her by the hand and led her deeper into the building. “Come along now.”

“Where are we going?”

“Downstairs.”

“Do you know where we’re going?”

“I know what I’m doing,” he said.

Several breathless flights of stairs later Rio let herself be dragged into a wide, vault-like room that smelled of chemicals and brine. Pale lights flickered in as they entered, revealing pale pale floors with silver trim. Covered troughs lined the walls.

Benjamin walked over to one of the troughs; it was three feet deep and set into the wall at waist height. A thick layer of frosted glass covered it. A metal clasp held the lid locked in place. He smiled grimly, “Now are these to keep people out or the contents in?”

“What’s in them?” Rio asked.

“Nothing yet. I’m here early,” Benjamin rapped a knuckle on the wall beside them producing a thick, yet hollow sound.

Rio saw that the entire wall was made from a thick glass-like material but all she could see through it was darkness. Were they underground and was this was some window into the Earth?

Once she pressed her face against the glass and cupped her hands over her eyes she saw there was a room on the other side of this glass, it looked huge and bottomless.

Benjamin led her away, “Quite the nursery isn’t it?”

“What are we doing here?”

“Furthering the Cause at best,” he made a show of waving his empty hands in front of her face, a swish of the fingers and suddenly he was holding a handful of gems- white rubies. “Thumbing our noses at the future at worst.”

“An incantation?” Rio asked, “Here?”

“You thought we were sightseeing?” Benjamin held the largest of the rubies between his thumb and forefinger and sat cross-legged on the floor, “Now go wait by the door, I have to concentrate.”

Rio bristled, how could he be so dismissive of her? Always treating her like she was stupid during the day and then coming to her bed at night with guilty eyes and quiet promises.

Of course none of those promises were for the future.

There was a muffled bang followed by a chorus of insectile screeches.

Benjamin Zachary looked up from staring into the heart of the gemstone, “That will be Zeth now…”

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

5 Second Fiction Eight Hundred and Sixty One

He had a successful run starring in porn films but was soon forgotten as audiences moved on to the next big thing.

5 Second Fiction Eight Hundred and Sixty

Jason Magwier hated working alone because he had no one to be cryptic to.

5 Second Fiction Eight Hundred and Fifty Nine

The CEO used a satellite video linkup from his private yacht to explain to the employees about his new cost cutting measures.

5 Second Fiction Eight Hundred and Fifty Eight

Zardek the Magnificent was a magician and an escape artist, naturally he had no trouble avoiding jury duty.

5 Second Fiction Eight Hundred and Fifty Seven

The round began, Reggie crapped in his hand and threw at his adversary. Xtreme Fighting had never been so extreme.

5 Second Fiction Eight Hundred and Fifty Six

If there was one thing Mark hated it was music, that was why he was the perfect radio programmer.

Ok fellow nerds... stop complaining about Spiderman 3 and X-Men 3...

Look what I had to deal with back in the day!



Thirty years later and the memory still burns!!!!

5 Second Fiction Eight Hundred and Fifty Five

Someone on the team should have realized that a surprise party for one of the world's greatest detectives was doomed to fail.

(Recommended Reads) " Who Are They?" By Kate Sherrod

My sister has no children; nor have I.
So where did these twin blonde-haired boys come from
That in my dream did greet me with a cry
And hug my legs until those limbs went numb?
Concerned they were with some fam'ly disease
Of which I'd never heard, and can't name now.
"Oh Auntie Kate," they cried, "Oh, tell us please,
Is this thing going to kill us? When, and how?"
I held them close but simply couldn't tell
What had them so disturbed. The anguish stays.
I still can feel their skinny forms so well
And feel their tears on my face. In such ways
A tired mind pulls something from the soul
Into the waking world. I've no control


click here to visit her site

5 Second Fiction Eight Hundred and Fifty Four

Sherrie's wedding day turned out just as she imagined there was a fire, a limousine crash and she got a near fatal lung infection.

5 Second Fiction Eight Hundred and Fifty Three

“For the last time Judy,” Lorelei said, “being a Wiccan is more than not trimming your bush!”

5 Second Fiction Eight Hundred and Fifty Two

“Am I worried about facing the Juggler?” Captain Hero laughed, “No! He's got more balls than brains.”

5 Second Fiction Eight Hundred and Fifty One

By now she was running on fumes but that was what happened when you ate seven burritos before a marathon.

5 Second Fiction Eight Hundred and Fifty

It wasn't until he had sex with a 4,000 year old Egyptian mummy that Abner truly understood what a dry hump was.

I know nothing about the plot to REVENGE OF THE ZEBRA MINISKIRT POLICE but I must see it!


But will I be wearing pants when I do?


Twitchfilm.net you are my enabler!

5 Second Fiction Eight Hundred and Forty Nine

Everyone suspected that aliens were visiting Earth in human guise, no one suspected it was because of their love of funnel cakes.

It's a creepy clown commercial cornucopia!

Pick your favorite!



Monday, January 25, 2010

'Bonanza' Star Pernell Roberts Dies at 81


'Bonanza' Star Pernell Roberts Dies at 81

Oddly enough I had just mentioned his series Bonanza in a recent story. Funny old world. Rest in peace sir.

Mad Mad Mad Mad Movies: Lisa and the Devil (1974), Or Telly Savalas Owns Us All


Mad Mad Mad Mad Movies: Lisa and the Devil (1974), Or Telly Savalas Owns Us All

I have no idea what this is but it made my brain explode at 1,000,000 miles per hour



MONSTER BRAINS you will be billed for my therapy!

A Lip Window? What on Earth is a - AUUUUUUUGH!!!!!!!




My God.,.. why did you show me this GEEKOLIGIE?

And why did I look?

I No Longer Fear Hell for I Have Been To the Senior Prom part three

Price Breaks and Heartaches
a journal of retail and failed romance
Prologue
I No Longer Fear Hell for I Have Been To the Senior Prom
part three


(When we last left this almost true story I had just discovered that my last minute date to the Senior Prom dancing the last dance of the night with someone else...)




"Uh," That's pretty much all I could say. "Uh."

My life has always had moments like this, moments where I have suddenly found myself on the receiving end of what could only be described as emotional slapstick. She was dancing with someone else, with someone that had made beating me up a part of their workout routine.

How the Hell was I supposed to get to third base or better now?

It was so damn unfair, everyone else at the prom had their booze, motel rooms and birth control devices waiting for them. All I had waiting for me was my grainy videotape of
Young Lady Chatterly.

This was, without a doubt, the worst night of my 18 years on the planet and the kicker was it had cost me two hundred bucks. I could only take solace in the fact that my blue balls matched my cummerbund.

"Why aren't you dancing?"
It was Lilly. I remember I said to her "Uh?"

"Why aren't you dancing?"

"I guess my date decided she'd rather dance with someone she can beat at Scrabble."

She frowned, "Poor Al."

"Hey! Why aren't you dancing?"

"Orville is helping stabilize Adrian until the paramedics arrive."

"What?"

"He fell down a flight of stairs with three Champagne bottles in his tux. There was blood everywhere! Well, you know how Orville wants to be an EMT so of course he had to help."

"Oh." See? Even then I had a way with words.

“Orville is very interested in his fellow man.”

“Yeah about that...”

"So," she asked. "Do you want to dance?"

While I don't talk about it much I do believe in God but my God is not the psychotic, anal-retentive hall monitor beloved by fundamentalists of every stripe. My God doesn't live in a burning bush or a pillar of fire, my God lives in serendipity and ironic coincidence. And for once the bastard came through for me. I got that girl on the dance floor as fast as I could.

I'm not going to get all 'purple prose' on you and tell you how that one dance for half a song has been burned into my synapses. How the touch of her, the glint in her eyes, and the smell of her perfume set a standard that I still measure all other girls and dances against...

Crap I just went and did it anyway didn't I?

The dance ended, the Prom ended and I was glad for that one sweet memory.

With the Prom over I knew that graduation was coming up fast and I was sure that I would never see most of these people again but I was very wrong, most of them would enter and leave my life again and again over the next decade. Some of them would break my heart, some of them I would learn to hate, some of them would still be my friends now.

And as for that annoying girl Joanna? I married her.

This is the story of how I finally realized that my perfect girl was right under my nose all along.



AUGH!!!! My eyes!!!!




Ok it has now been proven that the Sixth Doctor did not have the worst outfit in all of time and space.

click here to visit Plaid Stallions

Sunday, January 24, 2010

(Recommended Reads) "Nothing but a tree in January" by Estrella Azul

Consumed after a hard work day she lay down on the sofa and gazed at her Christmas tree...

click here to read the rest

(Recommended Reads) "My Name is Bill Franklin" by Lou Freshwater

When I was growing up I stayed with my Great-Aunt Sadie most all the time until I was about nine or ten. She lived down a dirt road in what used to be a town called Eufaula Alabama. Back then I thought it was the most boring place that had ever been forced on a kid. I didn’t want to be with an old lady and her old stories and old skin. I wanted to be with my mother, who was out dancing and charming the men of Eufaula and all its surrounding counties...

click here to read the rest

The Lightning Bug's Lair: For the Love of Price: Witchfinder General (1968)


The Lightning Bug's Lair: For the Love of Price: Witchfinder General (1968)

HORRORSQUAD shares with us the trailer for Drew Daywalt's 'Camera Obscura'



click here to visit HORRORSQUAD.com

(Recommended Reads) "Real Monsters Don't Take Time Off" by Eric J. Krause

"Daddy, the monster under my bed says he gets Sunday afternoons off."..

click here to read the rest