Saturday, July 25, 2015

ATTENTION AMERICA: Let it be known now that Chuck Tingle is a goddamn national treasure (assuming he lives here)

Back when I was trying to make my living as a full time writer I used to tell myself "Write something mainstream Al. Write something mainstream then when you get popular you can write the stuff you really want to write."

That was a mistake. I wrote stuff I didn't give a a shit about and as a result no writers or publishers did either.

So here is to you Chuck Tingle, you've got a vision and you're not backing down. You are sharing your dreams with the world and making the world take notice.

Kudos sir. Kudos right in your butt.

From Observer
With 50 Shades of Grey heading into theaters soon, erotic fiction has never been hotter than it is now. However, if you’re looking for something a little less mainstream than Shades, look no further than Amazon.com and emerging author Chuck Tingle. The prolific author already has eleven stories up on Amazon, including Pounded by President Bigfoot, My Billionaire Triceratops Craves Gay Ass, and his latest Bigfoot Sommelier Butt Tasting. Not much is known about who Mr. Tingle actually is. His Twitter bio gives some info on his past life — he claims to be both a “Tae Kwan Do grandmaster” and have a “PhD from DeVry University in holistic massage.” Besides that, and this book review from Buzzfeed, Mr. Tingle has not given any interviews or anything else in regards to his personal life. The Observer got in touch with Mr. Tingle, who agreed to answer some questions via e-mail. Now, people, please don’t think we thought we were corresponding with an actual martial artist and massage therapist that specializes in writing homo-erotic dinosaur/bigfoot/jet plane fiction. We couldn’t even confirm if he actually had a PhD...

After leaving New York to pursue his dream of making taffy without the restriction of oppressive flavor laws, Greg sets up shop in a small Colorado town. It’s the wild frontier, and Greg is more than happy to be a part of it. But conflict arises when a band of business-minded bigfeet show up by train, looking to buy up as much land as they can afford. Unfortunately, the most valuable land of all is located right inside Greg’s butthole. Now Greg must take all of the bigfoot settlers in a hardcore taffy shop gangbang that will determine the fate of this small town forever! This erotic tale is 4,600 words of sizzling human on bigfoot action, including blowjobs, rough sex, gangbangs, cream pies, facials, double anal and settler love.

When Donny lands a job at Jurassic Law, the world’s leading T-rex law firm, he’s absolutely thrilled. Unfortunately, after just one day it quickly becomes clear that Donny’s new position entails more than just legal work. Soon Donny makes the deal of a lifetime and finds himself contractually bound into a gay T-rex gangbang that gives new meaning to the term, “dinosaur bones.” This erotic tale is 3,700 words of sizzling human on gay dinosaur action, including anal, blowjobs, rough sex, double penetration, gangbangs and t-rex lawyer love.

Space can be a lonely place, especially when you’re stationed by yourself on the distant planet Zorbus. In fact, Lance isn’t quite sure that can last the whole year before his shuttle pod arrives, but when a mysterious visitor appears at Lance’s terraforming station, he quickly realizes that he might not be so alone after all. Soon enough, Lance becomes close with this mysterious new astronaut, a velociraptor. Together, they form an unlikely duo, which quickly begins to cross the boundaries of friendship into something much, much more sensual. It’s not gay if it’s a man and a dinosaur, is it? This erotic tale is 4,100 words of sizzling human on gay dinosaur action, including anal, blowjobs, rough sex, and space raptor love.

Roger is a ghost hunter on a quest to know if his long lost lover is still out there somewhere. His travels eventually bring him to a bed and breakfast in Georgia, where there have been several sightings of a ghostly unicorn colonel who fought and died during The Civil War. But when Roger encounters the gay ghost for himself, he soon finds out that there is more at play than just a routine haunting. This spirit is here to deliver a message from Roger’s dead unicorn lover, and it’s a message of gay, erotic pleasure that will shake Roger to his very core. This erotic tale is 4,300 words of sizzling human on gay unicorn ghost action, including anal, blowjobs, rough sex, and unicorn colonel love.

Jeremy was never quite sure about his feelings for Oliver, his gay pet dinosaur, until Oliver scores big and leaves home to pursue his dreams of being a dancer. Years later, the two of them reconnect for dinner in New York City, and realize that there may have been more to their relationship besides prehistoric pet and master. Now a wealthy socialite, Oliver the triceratops is willing to take another chance on Jeremy, and soon the two find themselves locked in a passionate evening of gay human-dino love. This erotic tale is 4,300 words of sizzling human on gay triceratops action, including anal, blowjobs, rough sex, and prehistoric beast love.

Allen has been interested in politics his entire life, but when things don’t work out the way he’d planned, Allen settles for a fast paced carrier in political journalism. It’s no surprise that Allen jumps at the chance to interview President Yuldok, a bigfoot, as well as the first non-human president of the United States. Allen also has his suspicions about the president’s sexuality, which come to a head during the interview. Soon enough, Allen is making history by taking a gay pounding in the oval office from the first bigfoot president! This erotic tale is 4,300 words of sizzling human on gay bigfoot action, including anal, blowjobs, double penetration, rough sex, and presidential beast love.



In the year 2016, living donuts have been banned from the United States thanks to their explicit sexual lifestyle. Still, a few of the hot living pastries remain as part of a gay, underground donut shop network. Looking for some adventure, Mike and his friends set out to find one of these exclusive gay dessert clubs, and end up biting off more than they can chew. Soon Mike finds himself at the center of attention and ready to be glazed by over a dozen horny gay donuts. This erotic tale is 4,100 words of sizzling human on gay dessert action, including anal, blowjobs, facials, rough sex, bukkake, and a frosted donut gangbang.

Mario is on a mission, cruising through the desert towards Las Vegas for his brothers wedding, and desperate to prove that he’s finally got his act together. Things are looking good until an unfortunate wreck strands Mario out in the hot sun without food or water. When Mario notices a motorcycle roaring across the desert towards him, he has no idea that his life is about to change forever. The rider, a gay unicorn named Kirk, offers to take him to Vegas, and soon the two of them find themselves on a journey, not just along the open road, but deep into each other’s hearts… and asses! This erotic tale is 4,300 words of sizzling human on gay unicorn action, including anal, blowjobs, rough sex, and biker love

Billy Brucko is an unsung hero of the Wild West, a hard working cattle rustler who understands that one day he will be forgotten in the history of frontier expansion. That is, until Billy is entrusted with delivering a strange wooden box from the president. Not long after starting his journey, Billy finds himself up against a gang of chocolate milk bandits, and his only escape is to delve deeper into the mystery of this strange box and the big red button that lies within. Soon, Billy is at the center of a gay gangbang with these handsome cowboy beverages, but this is only the beginning of his inner dimensional trip into the Tingleverse. This erotic tale is 4,200 words of sizzling human on gay chocolate milk, including anal, blowjobs, rough sex, double penetrations, gangbangs, bukkake and cowboy love.

On the eve of the biggest case of his life, attorney Mark Tucker gets some devastating news. The opposition has brought in a new lawyer, the notorious Nart Bulgok, who has never lost a case and is the mythical creature, Bigfoot, as well as a renowned doctor. After completely botching his opening statement, Mark retreats to a nearby bar to nurse his wounds. But when Nart shows up to offer an olive branch, things take a turn for the unexpected. Suddenly, the two of them find themselves wrapped up in a sordid night of erotic, gay desire, one that will change the shape of their hearts, and buttholes, forever. This erotic tale is 4,200 words of sizzling human on gay bigfoot action, including anal, blowjobs, rough sex, and doctor lawyer love.

Jeff just can’t seem to catch a break. Once a working professional at the top of his game, a string of bad luck has sent Jeff to the gutter, literally, where he struggles to survive as a homeless man on Venice Beach. Things go from bad to worse when Jeff is caught stealing a carnitas taco, and is promptly chased down by the Unicorn Butt Cops, a new branch of government that specializes in hot, gay, anal poundings on inline skates. The sentence is for a hardcore, double anal threesome, but little do these unicorn cops know that Jeff is an expert in all things gay and anal, leading to a twist ending that’s sure to blow your mind! This erotic tale is 4,300 words of sizzling human on unicorn action, including anal, double anal, threesomes, blowjobs, rough sex, and hardcore Unicorn Butt Cop punishment.

Out for a stroll after breaking up with his girlfriend, Tuck never could have imagined that he would meet the love of his life in the form of a gay unicorn sailor named Hunter, but that’s exactly what happens. The two share a romantic evening until it’s revealed that Hunter is about to embark on a year long sail around the world. However, their love remains strong in a series of explicit letters. But Hunter is planning something that will redefine the meaning of love between a man and a unicorn. Soon Tuck finds himself whisked away to the Bahamas on a private helicopter for a hardcore, anal surprise that will have your jaw on the floor. This erotic tale is 4,100 words of sizzling human on gay unicorn action, including anal, blowjobs, rough sex, cream pies, facials and sailor unicorn love.

What begins as the simple story of a man’s true love for a gay unicorn sailor quickly evolves into something else entirely, each tale pulling farther and farther out to reveal a breathtaking glimpse at the greatest author of our time. Like a butt within a butt within butt, this trilogy will have your perception of time and space turned completely upside down in total buttception. Welcome to the future of literature. ANALLY YOURS, THE UNICORN SAILOR Out for a stroll after breaking up with his girlfriend, Tuck never could have imagined that he would meet the love of his life in the form of a gay unicorn sailor named Hunter, but that’s exactly what happens. The two share a romantic evening until it’s revealed that Hunter is about to embark on a year long sail around the world. However, their love remains strong in a series of explicit letters. But Hunter is planning something that will redefine the meaning of love between a man and a unicorn. Soon Tuck finds himself whisked away to the Bahamas on a private helicopter for a hardcore, anal surprise that will have your jaw on the floor. POUNDED IN THE BUTT BY MY OWN BUTT Kirk is a scientific researcher on the leading edge of cloning technology, but his team has reached a standstill. In an effort to stabilize rapid clone growth, researchers have been taking DNA from various parts of their bodies and combining it with small amounts of animal DNA. But when the scientists combine samples from Kirk’s butt, brain, and a hawk, the resulting effect is a handsome, living ass who immediately sweeps Kirk off of his feet over a candlelit dinner for two. Kirk has finally found a lover that truly understands him at his very core… his own gay ass! POUNDED IN THE BUTT BY MY BOOK “POUNDED IN THE BUTT BY MY OWN BUTT” Buck Trungle is a world famous writer who is sick and tired of living in the shadow of his own books. But when his most recent novel, “Pounded In The Butt By My Own Butt” contacts him out of the blue and threatens a lawsuit, it’s a fear that Buck must now face head on. Buck’s novel is looking to collect royalties on sales of himself, and Buck’s lawyer is urging the writer to settle out of court, but when author and book finally meet face-to-face things take a turn for the erotic. Soon enough, Buck is selling himself to seal the deal with this sentient novel, but can he give his ass away without giving a piece of his heart, as well?

“My name is John Hams and I’m a sex addict.” And so begins Dr. Chuck Tingle’s first full length novel, Helicopter Man Pounds Dinosaur Billionaire Ass, a thrilling superhero origin story that will take you to the edge of gay erotic romance and stare bravely into the abyss. It is a story so powerful, so sensual, that it could change the very face of erotic literature forever. John Hams is a man who has lost it all, a nine-to-five nobody with an addiction to billionaire dinosaur bad boys. That is, until a freak accident at work imbues John with the ability to transform into an achingly handsome helicopter at will. Suddenly, things are looking up, as John uses his ability to woo the dashing stegosaurus from his addicts group who just happens to have a thing for rugged aircrafts. But it’s not long before John’s new helicopter identity starts to spin out of control, taking on a personality of its own as the wild and horny, Chibs Pratt, chopper with abs. Can John Hams become the hardcore gay hero that he is destined to be, or is this shifter bound to be nothing more than his own worst enemy?

When Carl’s bro sends him photos of a hot and sexy unicorn, he cant help getting turned on. But when Carl discovers that the unicorn of his dreams was once reality star and athlete, Bort Jenkins, a former tyrannosaurus rex from the show Borting Up With The Dinosaurs, Carl’s whole world turns upside down. Terrified that he may be dinosexual, conservative Carl is now thrown into a whirlwind of self-destruction, culminating in a literal encounter with his sexual identity fears. Soon enough, Carl finds himself in a hot gay gangbang with his physically manifested bigotry. But will this extreme pounding be enough to help this Carl learn that real love takes many forms? This erotic tale is 5,000 words of sizzling human on personified gayness action, including blowjobs, rough sex, gangbangs, cream pies, facials, double anal and physically manifested dinophobia.

When Alex boards a red-eye flight from New York to Los Angeles, he expects nothing more than another boring business trip. Little does Alex know that the plane itself will soon lead him on a life changing journey of erotic, gay passion. After learning about the plane’s side business as a blackjack card counter, Alex agrees to meet the billionaire aircraft at his luxurious Beverly Hills mansion. But when things start to heat up by the pool, Alex is taught a lesson in more than just counting cards. This erotic tale is 4,200 words of sizzling human on gay plane action, including anal, blowjobs, facials, rough sex, and billionaire plane love.




No comments:

Post a Comment